Ben! I am so sorry to hear that you were in the hospital. I wondered where you had run off to! Are you ok, Ben? I take it you are home but are you healing ok? How long is it going to be before you are feeling good again? I guess I should not try and make you laugh if it hurts so I will give you some gentle *hugs* instead. I am very glad that you are able to be at your computer again.

Dear val, using firefox means i don't have to sign-in. it also means i get to see the latest messages - yours for instance - so my belated thanks for it.
excuse the lack of or whatever is the result of using one finger to type. i am just returned from an wholly unexpected stay in a city hospital - now my idea of a loner's worst ever hell. no, i have all my fingers dear val but the movements of all other connected parts is painful but this slow method will suit me for as long as recovery lasts.
i find myself to be witless, muddled about dates and times and as yet unconvinced as to whether the responsible surgeon deserves my kisses or curses
this now self-declared big baby is pretty devastated and the once boastful self-sufficient idiot is brought to his knees by sheer incompetence and feebleness. to be re-made minus a bit or piece is to be forced into re-invention of a re-invention. very odd.
i am so unbelievably emotional i weep over all sorts of stimuli, i get stuck in a position which leaves me terrified of moving a 'muscle' - or what passed for same - in case the big beast grabs me in his jaws and tosses me in abject terror through air of his indifference.

how could i forget the way you did so much to help marlene, val. you inspired me to persist way beyond my competence and to get into a space i rarely visit - that of relative unselfishness.

my mistress - indeed my master, is, for the forseeable future just tears and pain. laughter is a huge risk but damn it i can still smile and touch those keys which are so important in this odd-space and spell you. and val and hugs and luv.

ben

I am just seeing your conversation with Twinkie. Its funny how things come full circle...it brings a tear to my eye. Do you remember how you and I met, Ben? I was in the Win Me forum relaying messages for my friend Marlene (angelize56) whose computer was broken down. You gave me advice on what to tell her to do..and I would call her up and read the messages to her over the phone and she would try everything. She knew who you were of course because she seemed to know everyone here.

I dont know if you knew it or not but Twinkie is her twin sister!

oh my gosh, Ben...I dont know where to even start in my reply. That is one of the most delightful messages I have gotten to date!

My husband has tried to teach me to swim several times over the years. The last time he tried, he had me stand in 3 feet of water and practice putting my face in the water. Thats all I had to do..just put my face full into the water with my arms out beside me on top of the water. I started to fall forward and panicked and came up splashing and sputtering like I was going to drown. He had the gall to laugh at me so I promptly burst into tears (to teach him a lesson!) and then stomped off (do you know how hard it is to stomp your feet underwater to get your point across?) and went into the house, slamming the door loud enough to rattle the windows! The very worst part of it all is that all the way to the house, my wet sneakers were making farty sounds every time I took a step and my husband laughed even louder at me! Do you know how hard it is to stay mad when you are wearing sneakers that sound like a bodily function when you walk?

The only other time that I was willing to learn was when a snake tried to make me run 15 feet in a 12 foot boat! It dropped down from under my seat and I was ready to swim or die trying. I was even prepared to abandon my own children and husband to save myself! Isnt that a terrible thing for a mother to do? Hubby caught me by the waistband of my jeans at the stern and reminded me that I was not wearing a life jacket. Common sense prevailed...especially since the snake was long gone, having been thrown overboard by hubby the hero in the moments immediately after he alerted me to its presence in the boat. Still...I made him pull the boat to the bank and we all got out so he could tip the boat over and pound the seats to scare out the mama snake that I was convinced were there. She must have already slithered over the side when all the screaming began, though because she didnt show her face to us.

Yes Ben..there are times when I wish I could swim but I dont see it happening. I am so thankful that my hubby taught our older kids to swim like fishies...our 2 year old will also learn in the next year or two. I hope so anyways. I am counting on them all to keep me safe on future fishing trips (I love to fish!!) I dont want to worry about someone else drowning besides myself! I would like to try scuba diving though! It would be great to be able to breath underwater!

So you know AcaCandy, do you? She is one of the sweetest ladies I know here...what did you do to get on her bad side, Ben? Just kidding...she scares me too and people dont scare me easily (only water, snakes and spiders can do that) She's a lot of fun to pick on though isnt she!

If you can find more time so I can sit here and visit with you instead of doing my chores then I would gladly pay you for it! Maybe I should put my family to work so I can free up more time. I will try the ship bell idea...the only thing is that when I ring it, I suspect half the town will show up expecting dinner! We are in farm country here....far from the sea. A bell ringing out here in the wilderness means "supper is ready..come and get it!"

I have often toyed with the idea of attaching a cowbell to my toddler though...to keep track of his whereabouts, mind you. The only thing stopping me is that I worry people might think its a strange sight.

Hello, most busy Mom,

Not swim? Neither can most sailors since they recognise the futility of swimming with (sometimes) miles of water beneath them.So what do they do? Well they wear life-jackets and form friendly circles and kick their feet (to drive away predators). They probably sing bawdy songs to keeps their spirits up. And if they are lucky all those ladies and children who had first dibs on the life-boats may allow them them on-board.
You asked: "How much time did you spend at sea?
My answer: In a six month voyage about three months but then there is another answer possible. And that is I have been all at sea since I first found out what the word 'sea' meant - sixty-eight years so far!

Have the children fit you with water-wings and show you have to move your arms and legs, val. I think they would have endless patience and great merriment out of the process.. They could also rope you to a sturdy tree in case you got away from them. But make sure they teach you with your head up stream - you will have more natural buoyancy head to the flow. Nothing to it, val. Goggles and flippers might help too. If they show signs of increasing boredom tell them the deal is teach and eat or vice-versa. Even your cats can swim though they hate it. A cat presumably does the cat-paddle just as a sensible dog does the dog-paddle. That may be the first stroke they should get you doing. By the end of summer you could be the best swimmer in the family or your kids the best cooks on the river.

I recognise that someone with over 400 friends who want your advice on matters ranging from snaring the man to jugging the hare, making rose-hip wine to making your own besom broom, to say nothing of dusting the innards of a computer, repairing plumbing and dry-walling, nourishing your man with wholesome meals and pointed fur-covered remarks, and how to live in a democracy where a woman is king - could be time-consuming were it not for the fact that your fingers are nimble and love dancing on keys and your mind can handle six or more different conversations at any given moment without missing a beat. I know you can do it cos your friend-count includes all the folk who count around hereabouts. Indeed I find it reassuring to be in such exalted company since it suggests I am on the right track in my search for wisdom.

"TSG is a great little town" - you suggest. Pause while porridge-head simmers. I think it is a labyrinth of intrigues, spies, layabouts, fantasists, necromancers, and whimsey. (what do all these faint red lines means under these words? Don't answer that, val. Of pomp and pomposity, of innuendo & smartasses and delinquent 12 year-olds posing as advanced geeks (that they may well be). As for the guy seeking honeymoon ideas in Random recently I had to severely restrain myself or else risk the ire of Aca Candy - she has terrible ire, val, she's Alice in Wonderland who hands out shrinking candy to any transgressing male. I am terrified of her. OK I agree it's a great little town.but AC is the police chief and she won't lock-up Mulder.

As for that word/character count that's why you are my friend cos Mike dare not restrain you. No I am lying. You are my friend cos you speak to me.

I think I shall start a thread in Random asking for advice on increasing the time available to busy moms for frittering. There has to be a way. No one in a large family should have more fritter time than anyone else - it needs looking at. We need a time and motion study expert. Maybe those children are frittering too much in the river or up the trees.A ship's bell hanging on the porch. I like that idea. I ring of the bell is for cakes and candies. When they line-up the news is after chores. The neighbour's kids, idle monkeys, energy to spare put em to work. Husbands always come home looking deadbeat as a matter of principle. Make sure there are no chairs empty. And then ring the bell once. The kids won't come of course, but husband will appear. What's that for? I ring it when I could use a little help. Would you mind clearing the chairs so there is somewhere to sit? And while you are doing it sort the laundry, there's a darling. Personnel management - books on. You have a large crew,val. Make 'em work. (While you fritter).

The trouble I have with mine. Incredible. They don't want to do beans. I shouldn't have to do all the work at 74. I am a shadow of my former self. I want to sleep all the time. Using the imagination and acting all the parts is exhausting. I am thinking of striking. Or eating shrinking candy till I do a Cheshire Cat.

dear val.

Your frittered friend,

Ben.

So you were a sailor, huh? The very thought scares the dickens out of me. I cant swim! And the worst part is that a river flows by just 50 yards away from my house! I have tried to learn but I dont have anyone patient enough to teach me. How much time did you spend at sea altogether? I can see why letters were important. I bet you love to read too! You have led an interesting life, Ben. You should write your memoirs! You certainly have a gift with words (oh to be as eloquent!)

I'm glad you have the time to write. Me, I will make you wait for a reply more often than not these days. Between my 2 year old, 12 year old, 13 year old, a husband and 2 cats....I am lucky to find a block of time that lasts longer than 15 minutes in my day. It drives me crazy because I am a people person and I really love my online friends and getting to know all of you and I hate making people wait for me to write back.

Its wonderful to be able to have a glimpse into the lives of other people who I never would have known otherwise. TSG is a great little town, isnt it?

You asked: "Do we need to count characters?"

My answer: haha! I wonder if there was a limit and if anyone has ever reached it! I think i've met a kindred "wordy" spirit so we shall see. All I can say is that its a good thing Mike keeps upgrading and expanding the site so it can handle more! I bet you and I have the record for the longest visitor messages at TSG!

*hugs*
val

val, I am glad I asked you all those "You asked's" mainly because I feel as if I have taken a toddler's step towards the fat cat sleeping on the mat and managed, at long last, to avoid falling and squishing him/her/it. I am sure I am giggling as a proud toddler might. (We need a giggling smilie - you tell Mike when you tell him we should have, if not more +s, then a colour code we can allocate to our friend's +s - e.g. gold, more gold and all gold!

The energy and wonderment of children is a miracle to behold - and I become serious as I cast about the porridge of my mind gathering tiny currants to reassure myself my memory is intact where it matters. I recall a friend's big sister who 'haunted' his large cool and dark-in-places home. I don't know when I was told she suffered from asthma but I hope, as I write this, I was gentle with her.

You asked, "do all of my smilie gifs annoy you?"

My answer. Absolutely not, val. Were there 10x the number I would be happy because to be a pedestrian typist is to be forced to travel with enormous care when the heart wants to fly.

In some ways I remember the hand-written letters of the first 60+ years of my life with affection. I certainly remember how important they were to the hoping and sometimes-receiving sailors, and the hours we spent - with the ship considerably agitated by a swelling ocean or an importunate wind - one hand holding-on the other racing across the page as we poured out our longings for the peace of home. Imagination is such a powerful force and ours told us we had such a fever as home drew near enough to taste and smell and see - thus to believe in - we named it Channel Fever; and not one soul on board, no matter how sanquin or phlegmatic, or sensible and serious could avoid the infection. We danced on air those last oh-too-long days, were giddy and kind and dreadfully cheerful when, for the past six months or so, we had been, perhaps necessarily, other. In those letters, val, I sometimes would draw little pictures or plans to amuse or 'better inform' the reader.

In summary - even snails dance! Here's to Smilies - may they increase and show the diversity we diverse critters need in this age of 0I00II
__ from Cheshire with love.

Do we need to count characters?

You may never write/type more dangerous words than these, val "So whats new with you? Click on the "view conversation" in this message box and you'll see our conversation come up and you can answer back when you have the time. *hugs*"

Why dangerous? Because time is all I have. So it's me whose house should have leaky pipes but then, looking-up, I see it's dark and I have had my head down for probably two hours - so no danger, val.

Thank-you for help, encouragement and sharing.

Ben.

You asked, "Val, why is there a plus sign by your name in the list of on-liners?" and "why only one?"

My answer: A plus sign indicates that I am on your friend list...everyone only gets one...but I think I deserve to have at least 3 or 4 pluses! I'll have to take up my complaint with Techguy and demand more pluses!

You asked, "When its sweltering hot in New York (city) does that mean that you have something similar? Do you have weather that makes your children moan when they see it?"

My answer: Our weather here in upstate NY is actually a bit cooler than in New York city...we stay about 5-10 degrees cooler than they do. In the winter time, we also get colder temps than they do. Our forecast this coming week is mid 70's while theirs is 80-85's. We get really high humidity here and that is something to complain about, especially for me, having asthma...hot humid weather makes it hard for me to breathe so I stay inside where its cool. The kids arent bothered by the hot weather...they just go jump in the pool or in the river. I wish I had their energy, Ben!

You asked: "Why do I feel as tho I am tresspassing on your space when I post here?"

My answer: I dont know but stop feeling that way! Its always a nice surprise to see your messages to me...they put a smile on my face! If you want, you can always pm me if you dont like this public visiting. I'm fine visiting with you either way.

You asked: "where do I post my responses to your posts which appear in my profile?"

My answer: You can click on the lower right-hand text that says "view conversation"...it is there that you will see our entire conversation and everything you write there will show up on my profile page. For instance...I will not see this answer to you in my visitor messages unless I click on the "view conversation". Until I do that, it will look like your are talking to me and I am not answering you! To see my conversations with other people, you can click on and of the "view conversation" links in my visitor messages list...ekim68's for example..and there you can see what he and I visit about. But just to look at my profile, it looks like I havent said a word to him! I dont know why its set up this way. Does it make any better sense to you?

It takes some getting used to, thats for sure! But its quicker than sending private messages and its a nice way to say hello without filling up your private message box.

Lastly, you asked "is val or Val your preference?"

My answer: val is fine. Its saves people from having to capitalize the V every time they talk to me!

I think someone should write a tutorial of some sort for visitor messages because it really was confusing at first. If you type a message in your own visitor message box to try and answer someone who has left you a message, they wont see it unless they happen to come visit your profile page...to make sure they see it, you have to either go directly to their profile or use the "view conversation" link.

I hope this helps and I didnt make it worse.

Nothing new going on here in my life...well actually, we had a leaky pipe in the wall and it ended up ruining 2 floors and a wall! What a mess! But its not a major crisis...just an annoyance.

So whats new with you? Click on the "view conversation" in this message box and you'll see our conversation come up and you can answer back when you have the time. *hugs*

Now I have a question for you....do all of my smilie gifs annoy you? I have a habit of using them a LOT!

Val, why is there a plus sign by your name in the list of the on-liners? Why only one? The fact that no one else has one (my eyes are tired perhaps) is neither here nor there.

When it's sweltering hot in New York (city) does that mean you have something similar? Do you have weather which makes your children moan when they see it?

Why do I feel as tho I am trespassing on your space when I post in here?

I have more questions about this socialising business than I have answers. One question I demand an answer to where do I post my responses to your posts which appear in my profile? My responses are missing in the dialog below you must be feeling you are talking to yourself as far as I am concerned.

Help, val, help please (or point me to the how-to). And is val or Val your preference?

Greetings,

Ben.

Happy Father's Day, Ben!