[Pistoff]

The game of choice for unemployed people or maintenance level workers is
basketball.

The game of choice for frontline workers is football.

The game of choice for middle management is tennis.

The game of choice for CEOs and executives is golf.

Conclusion: The higher up on the corporate ladder you are, the smaller your balls are.

[Couriant]

one for Franky:

Q: Why was the math book always sad?
A: Because it has a lot of problems.

[franca]

Originally Posted by Couriant

one for Franky:

Q: Why was the math book always sad?
A: Because it has a lot of problems.

[Skivvywaver]

Grandma and Grandpa were visiting their kids overnight. When Grandpa
found a bottle of Viagra in His son's medicine cabinet, he asked about using
one of the pills.

The son said, "I don't think you should take one Dad; they're very
strong and very expensive".

"How much?" asked Grandpa.
"$ 10.00 a pill," answered the son.

"I don't care," said Grandpa, "I'd still like to try one, and before we leave in the morning, I'll put the money under the pillow."
Later the next morning, the son found $110..00 under the pillow. He called
Grandpa and said, "I told you each pill was $10.00, not $110.00."

"I know," said Grandpa. "The hundred is from Grandma."

[GoJoAGoGo]

Originally Posted by Skivvywaver

Grandma and Grandpa were visiting their kids overnight. When Grandpa
found a bottle of Viagra in His son's medicine cabinet, he asked about using
one of the pills.

The son said, "I don't think you should take one Dad; they're very
strong and very expensive".

"How much?" asked Grandpa.
"$ 10.00 a pill," answered the son.

"I don't care," said Grandpa, "I'd still like to try one, and before we leave in the morning, I'll put the money under the pillow."
Later the next morning, the son found $110..00 under the pillow. He called
Grandpa and said, "I told you each pill was $10.00, not $110.00."

"I know," said Grandpa. "The hundred is from Grandma."

LOL good one ...

[Couriant]

Originally Posted by Skivvywaver

Grandma and Grandpa were visiting their kids overnight. When Grandpa
found a bottle of Viagra in His son's medicine cabinet, he asked about using
one of the pills.

The son said, "I don't think you should take one Dad; they're very
strong and very expensive".

"How much?" asked Grandpa.
"$ 10.00 a pill," answered the son.

"I don't care," said Grandpa, "I'd still like to try one, and before we leave in the morning, I'll put the money under the pillow."
Later the next morning, the son found $110..00 under the pillow. He called
Grandpa and said, "I told you each pill was $10.00, not $110.00."

"I know," said Grandpa. "The hundred is from Grandma."

[Couriant]

A woman goes over to her married son's house and walks in to find her daughter-in-law sitting in a chair, entirely nude. The mother-in-law says, “What are you doing?”

“I'm wearing my love dress,” responds the daughter-in-law, “We haven't made love in a long time.”

So the mother-in-law says, “Hm, maybe I should try that.”

She goes home to find her husband is not in, so she gets undressed. Two hours go by and finally she hears her husband's car. He walks in the front door and says, “What are you doing?”

“I'm wearing my love dress,” says the wife.

“Well,” responds the husband, “it needs to be ironed.”

[franca]

Prosecutor: "Did you kill the victim?"
Defendant: "No, I did not."
Prosecutor: "Do you know what the penalties are for perjury?"
Defendant: "Yes, I do. And they're a hell of a lot better than the penalty for murder. "

[Couriant]

First Class Blondie

A beautiful young blonde woman boards a plane to LA with a ticket for the coach section. She looks at the seats in coach and then looks ahead to the first class seats. Seeing that the first class seats appear to be much larger and more comfortable, she moves forward to the last empty one. The flight attendant checks her ticket and tells the woman that her seat is in coach.

The blonde replies, "I'm young, blonde and beautiful, and I'm going to sit here all the way to LA."

Flustered, the flight attendant goes to the cockpit and informs the captain of the blonde problem. The captain goes back and tells the woman that her assigned seat is in coach.

Again, the blonde replies, "I'm young, blonde and beautiful, and I'm going to sit here all the way to LA."

The captain doesn't want to cause a commotion, and so returns to the cockpit to discuss the blonde with the co-pilot. The co-pilot says that he has a blonde girlfriend, and that he can take care of the problem. He then goes back and briefly whispers something into the blonde's ear.

She immediately gets up, says, "Thank you so much," hugs the co-pilot, and rushes back to her seat in the coach section. The pilot and flight attendant, who were watching with rapt attention, together ask the co-pilot what he had said to the woman.

He replies, "I just told her that the first class section isn't going to LA."

[lexmarks567]

woman was helping her husband set up his computer, and at the appropriate point in the process, the computer advised him that he would now need to enter a password. Something he will use to log on. The husband was in a rather amorous mood and figured he would try for the shock effect to bring this to his wife's attention. So, when the computer asked him to enter his password, he made it plainly obvious to his wife what he was entering by stating each letter out loud as he typed . . .

P

E

N

I

S

His wife fell off her chair laughing when the computer replied:

***PASSWORD REJECTED . . . NOT LONG ENOUGH

[MorrisAO]

Originally Posted by lexmarks567

woman was helping her husband set up his computer, and at the appropriate point in the process, the computer advised him that he would now need to enter a password. Something he will use to log on. The husband was in a rather amorous mood and figured he would try for the shock effect to bring this to his wife's attention. So, when the computer asked him to enter his password, he made it plainly obvious to his wife what he was entering by stating each letter out loud as he typed . . .

P

E

N

I

S

His wife fell off her chair laughing when the computer replied:

***PASSWORD REJECTED . . . NOT LONG ENOUGH

And I just did the same - fell off my chair laughing that is...

That's hilarious!

[Zaney1]

Now that is F U N N Y !!

[franca]

Originally Posted by lexmarks567

woman was helping her husband set up his computer, and at the appropriate point in the process, the computer advised him that he would now need to enter a password. Something he will use to log on. The husband was in a rather amorous mood and figured he would try for the shock effect to bring this to his wife's attention. So, when the computer asked him to enter his password, he made it plainly obvious to his wife what he was entering by stating each letter out loud as he typed . . .

P

E

N

I

S

His wife fell off her chair laughing when the computer replied:

***PASSWORD REJECTED . . . NOT LONG ENOUGH

I like it.......

[franca]

Bacon and Eggs walk into a bar. The bartender says "Sorry, we don't serve breakfast."

[Blackmirror]

whats black and whit lives in trees and is highly dangerous ???







a magpie with a machine gun