[Blackmirror]

[lexmarks567]

quotes from the TV series "Scrubs".






J.D.: Look, uh... Janitor...
[the Janitor rolls his eyes]
J.D.: ...I'm gonna be straight with you: I saw your penis, and I noticed a possible melanoma that you should really have checked out.
Janitor: When did you see my penis?
J.D.: Last night, when you were showering.
Janitor: Where were you?
J.D.: Oh, I was outside, in the bushes.
[the Janitor takes a second to process this answer]
Janitor: Uhhh...
J.D.: Look, it was just a coincidence, man - I mean, i-i-if you had looked out the window, you'd have seen my penis, you know!
Janitor: What? Why?
J.D.: Because I had it out while I was looking at yours!

[Greytabby]

do i get another corny award for this one...

A guy goes to a girl's house for the first time and she shows him into the living room.

She excuses herself to go to the kitchen to make a few drinks.

As he's standing there alone, he notices a cute little vase on the mantel.

He picks it up and as he's looking at it, she walks back in.

He says, "What's this?"

"Oh, my father's ashes are in there," she replies.

Turning beet red, he apologizes for bringing it up.

She continues, "Yeah, he's too lazy to go to the kitchen to get an ashtray."

[franca]

Originally Posted by Greytabby

do i get another corny award for this one...

A guy goes to a girl's house for the first time and she shows him into the living room.

She excuses herself to go to the kitchen to make a few drinks.

As he's standing there alone, he notices a cute little vase on the mantel.

He picks it up and as he's looking at it, she walks back in.

He says, "What's this?"

"Oh, my father's ashes are in there," she replies.

Turning beet red, he apologizes for bringing it up.

She continues, "Yeah, he's too lazy to go to the kitchen to get an ashtray."

Yes !!!!!!!!

[franca]

As You Slide Down the Banister of Life, Remember.


1. Jim Baker and Jimmy Swaggert have written an impressive new book. It's called "Ministers Do More Than Lay People."

2. Transvestite: A guy who likes to eat, drink and be Mary.

3. The difference between the Pope and your boss...the Pope only expects you to kiss his ring.

4. My mind works like lightning. One brilliant flash and it is gone.

5. The only time the world beats a path to your door is if you're in the bathroom.

6. I hate sex in the movies. Tried it once. The seat folded up, the drink spilled and that ice, well, it really chilled the mood.

7. It used to be only death and taxes were inevitable. Now, of course, there's shipping and handling, too.

8. A husband is someone who, after taking the trash out, gives the impression that he just cleaned the whole house.

9. My next house will have no kitchen -- just vending machines and a large trash can.

10. A blonde said, "I was worried that my mechanic might try to rip me off. I was relieved when he told me all I needed was turn signal fluid."

11. My neighbor was bit by a stray rabid dog. I went to see how he was and found him writing frantically on a piece of paper. I told him rabies could be treated, and he didn't have to worry about a Will. He said, "Will? What Will? I'm making a list of the people I want to bite."

12. Definition of a teenager? God's punishment for enjoying sex.

13. As you slide down the banister of life, may the splinters never point the wrong way.

[Blackmirror]

http://www.break.com/index/giggling_..._audience.html

giggling baby
lol
http://www.break.com/index/a_couple_...ng_babies.html

my eyes are streaming

[franca]

Originally Posted by Blackmirror

http://www.break.com/index/giggling_..._audience.html

giggling baby
lol
http://www.break.com/index/a_couple_...ng_babies.html

my eyes are streaming

Seen the giggling baby one before, but still lmao.......

[franca]

Apple Computer announced today that it has developed a computer chip that can store and play music in women's breast implants.

The iBreast will cost £499 to £599.

This is considered to be a major breakthrough because women are always complaining about men staring at their breasts and not listening to them.

[Blackmirror]

Originally Posted by franca

Apple Computer announced today that it has developed a computer chip that can store and play music in women's breast implants.

The iBreast will cost £499 to £599.

This is considered to be a major breakthrough because women are always complaining about men staring at their breasts and not listening to them.

[LouisStDubois]

It was Ben Franklin who said "Better to be silent and be thought a fool than to speak and remove all doubt." Samuel Langhorn Clements was a great man, but he didn't say that. If he did he was plagerizing old Ben.

[Greytabby]

Originally Posted by franca

Apple Computer announced today that it has developed a computer chip that can store and play music in women's breast implants.

The iBreast will cost £499 to £599.

This is considered to be a major breakthrough because women are always complaining about men staring at their breasts and not listening to them.

[franca]

I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman: "Where's the self-help section?"

She said that if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.

[Couriant]

Originally Posted by Blackmirror

Tidus4yuna what does it mean lol

It's from the game Final Fantasy X. Tidus and Yuna are the hero and heroine of the story.

[Blackmirror]

Originally Posted by Couriant

It's from the game Final Fantasy X. Tidus and Yuna are the hero and heroine of the story.

A FFfan then .. loved FF7