[Cheeseball81]

So here's the latest update and I gotta tell you, it's a struggle
Basically dr's are telling us 2 different things

One dr. and his wife (who is an oncologist), basically told my grandma they can't determine if it's cancer without getting a biopsy of the tumor
They said it's up to her what she wants to do
Surgery is no longer an option, just chemo - again, she needs to decide whether or not she'd want it

Thennnnnnn, some other "know it all" really rude dr. pulls my Mom outside the room (wouldn't talk to my grandma) and was like "she has cancer, it's everywhere, she needs treatment now. it's not like we're dealing with stage 1!"
What the hell? who is HE to say all of this? based on what? they haven't even run the tests yet.

Needless to say, we're at a loss. My grandma looks at us and wants our opinions on what she should do. But in the end, it's really her decision.

[poochee]

Originally Posted by Cheeseball81

So here's the latest update and I gotta tell you, it's a struggle
Basically dr's are telling us 2 different things

One dr. and his wife (who is an oncologist), basically told my grandma they can't determine if it's cancer without getting a biopsy of the tumor
They said it's up to her what she wants to do
Surgery is no longer an option, just chemo - again, she needs to decide whether or not she'd want it

Thennnnnnn, some other "know it all" really rude dr. pulls my Mom outside the room (wouldn't talk to my grandma) and was like "she has cancer, it's everywhere, she needs treatment now. it's not like we're dealing with stage 1!"
What the hell? who is HE to say all of this? based on what? they haven't even run the tests yet.

Needless to say, we're at a loss. My grandma looks at us and wants our opinions on what she should do. But in the end, it's really her decision.

That second Dr. is disgusting. I can understand how Grandma feels, but I wish she would have the biopsy. If it's not cancer, she would get some relief from knowing. Praying for you and the folks.

[grandma77]

Bless your heart Nicole. You all should report that doctor. He was really out of line. At your grandma's age I am not sure what I would do. So I will continue to pray for her to have wisdom in the decision she makes. Either way they can't remove the tumor. Will pray for your mom also...this must be hard on her too.

[Cheeseball81]

Thanks guys
Yes, my mom is a pretty good wreck over all this too.

I can't say I'd know what to do in this position (whether I'd want to know or not)
A part of me thinks she is better not knowing and just enjoy her life

If I were 88, I would certainly not wanna go through chemo, she could get really sick, fall down the stairs, anything could happen. Why be sick with what time you have left?

[poochee]

Originally Posted by Cheeseball81

Thanks guys
Yes, my mom is a pretty good wreck over all this too.

I can't say I'd know what to do in this position (whether I'd want to know or not)
A part of me thinks she is better not knowing and just enjoy her life

If I were 88, I would certainly not wanna go through chemo, she could get really sick, fall down the stairs, anything could happen. Why be sick with what time you have left?

I have known several people who have walked this road, they were ready to go Home and felt peaceful about it. All we can do is give loving support if they make that decision.

My Mother made that decision. It was a hard road for me to walk, but she was ready to go Home.

[Prinnylynn]

The nurse in me wants to tell you that treatment options at 88 are very delicate situations..........
At the optimal end of things maybe it buys her some more time...unfortunately, an quality of life she has at the moment will more often then not dwindle with Chemo. My Grandpa didnt want Chemo, but my grandma begged.... ( believe me when I tell you that your grandma isnt thinking about herself right now, she is measuring your reaction to see how you and your family are going to make out with her decision.....) so my Grandpa gave in reluctantly to have some Chemo to maybe buy him a few more months......he lost his hair, he was severly ill, he lost a large amount of weight, he lost his appetite, his energy, his spirit and gained 3 weeks before he lost his entire battle miserably at 70 years old. My grandma still feels guilty that she begged him to have chemo....

I am not giving you professional advice, but personally....it will always be hard to say goodbye. Hugss Nicole...Oh yeah...the 2nd doctor has no bedside manner....not uncommon...but you dont need him.

[grandma77]

I agree with Prinny. Quality of life over a few extra weeks can be of more benefit. Being able to share love with your family instead of being sick from chemo when it is given just to prolong life... I can see where your grandma wouldn't want it.

Nicole, I will continue to pray for wisdom for Grandma in the decisions she needs to make and for peace of heart for everyone.

[Cheeseball81]

Thanks Prinny. It was really helpful to hear a nurse's side. I agree with you whole heartedly. I think her having chemo would be a huge mistake.
Thanks grandma

Hugs to you both

Nana is home now.
They discharged her yesterday, changed her meds, and want her to have tests on the tumor.
She already doesn't feel well today and actually wanted to go back to the hospital.

[Blackmirror]

My unclle starts gis chemo next week for prostate cancer
13 weeks every day
They are taking the caravan and staying as its a 100 mile trip

[poochee]

Will pray for Uncle.

[Beas shadow]

Originally Posted by Shadow Bea

Go to see your Dr. please.. it may be stress or other things but it is better to check it out..
Congratulations on your upcoming marriage!! ..

Good & sound advice from my lovely wife.

[poochee]

Bump

[CrazyComputerMan]

I would like to pray for Jill (our dog) because just recently Jill's ex-owner's sister, pat died recently because she fall out of bed and broke the hip.

But the good thing that i believe in heaven and im feeling good that Daphne's sister will meet daphne in heaven.

I feeling guilty that i havent visited her recently as i was planning to do.

God bless

[Nekochanpurr]

Please pray for my family, but specially for my uncle Howard. He just lost his wife of 60 years. We were all very close to her.. She was our favorite (and only haha) Nanny. <3 Which we ALL called her.. As in, all of my aunts and uncles, dad, their kids, and my cousins kids.. That was our nanny. They never had any kids of their own.. And by the grace of God, my grandma was giving enough to share the joy of her children with my uncle howard and nanny. Through that started the ritual of having them in our lives.. A lot! They were the run to people when my aunts/uncle/dad got made at their parents. They were the place my sister and i stayed almost EVERY Friday night. she taught me how to french braid, how to paint my nails. I honestly think i'm still in shock.. I can't believe life will go on without her.
Its even worse for my uncle. While she was only 78.. Hes 83. In my whole life together, i NEVER remember them being apart. Oh! no, i forgot. Once nanny had to come to the door without him.,. We had chicken pox, and he never got it. o.o;
ANYWAY. This is going to be a really hard time for him. We have all been trying to be with him as much as possible, and let him know how much he means to us. Please pray that he feels at peace with whats done so that he can relax in knowing nanny is okay..

Ack.. sorry this is so long winded.. She only died the 12th.. So its still pretty fresh. =/

[poochee]

Originally Posted by Nekochanpurr

Please pray for my family, but specially for my uncle Howard. He just lost his wife of 60 years. We were all very close to her.. She was our favorite (and only haha) Nanny. <3 Which we ALL called her.. As in, all of my aunts and uncles, dad, their kids, and my cousins kids.. That was our nanny. They never had any kids of their own.. And by the grace of God, my grandma was giving enough to share the joy of her children with my uncle howard and nanny. Through that started the ritual of having them in our lives.. A lot! They were the run to people when my aunts/uncle/dad got made at their parents. They were the place my sister and i stayed almost EVERY Friday night. she taught me how to french braid, how to paint my nails. I honestly think i'm still in shock.. I can't believe life will go on without her.
Its even worse for my uncle. While she was only 78.. Hes 83. In my whole life together, i NEVER remember them being apart. Oh! no, i forgot. Once nanny had to come to the door without him.,. We had chicken pox, and he never got it. o.o;
ANYWAY. This is going to be a really hard time for him. We have all been trying to be with him as much as possible, and let him know how much he means to us. Please pray that he feels at peace with whats done so that he can relax in knowing nanny is okay..

Ack.. sorry this is so long winded.. She only died the 12th.. So its still pretty fresh. =/

So sorry to hear about Nanny. Will pray for Uncle Howard and the whole family. I know how difficult it is to lose a loved one.