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  • I can only imagine how deeply this hurts you, and I wish I could say something comforting to you. I'm so glad you could use my previous words for some comfort. At some point, it stops being our responsibility, it stops being about you, and bad parenting, and becomes about the choices the person is making. Ultimately, it is your son's choice. I believe you do him more good by being real, by being honest, and by believing he can change and grow, than you would if you just caved.

    It may take many years for your son to realize these things, but I believe he eventually will. It took me many years with my alcoholic mother, but when I finally did, it felt so good.

    I'm in your corner, and any time you wish to whine, cry, rant, I'm available.
    Thanks for the update. I hate it that my life has become about my health, and it's just a teensy bit of what life for you, Bea, and Jonsiegirl's brother Bob, must be like. I certainly see my mortality. But I am an a optimist, and have hope that this too shall pass as a phase in my life,

    You are one of the people that I have always felt a connection to, and appreciation for. One of the people that I'd always read every post you made, simply because you made it. It is my sincere wish that your life will improve, and that the middle son gets it. As parents, I think we owe our kids two things; honesty, and consistency. In the short run, it may look like it makes absolutely no difference, in the long run, it makes all the difference. At least that is what I believe, and I believe you're doing your son a great favor with your integrity.

    Carolyn, I have missed you mightily, but felt that I was respecting your wishes. I am very pleased to be reconnecting with you.

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