New Eupehmisms for the PC

Hulk701

Thread Starter
Banned
Joined
Dec 5, 2003
Messages
2,581
New Euphemisms for the Politically Correct:

HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:

1. She is not a "BABE" or a "CHICK" - She is
"BREASTED AMERICAN."

2. She is not a "SCREAMER" or a "MOANER" - She IS "VOCALLY APPRECIATIVE."

3. She is not "EASY" - She is "HORIZONTALLY
ACCESSIBLE."

4. She is not a "DUMB BLONDE" - She is a
"LIGHT-HAIRED DETOUR OFF THE
INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY."

5. She has not "BEEN AROUND" - She is A
"PREVIOUSLY-ENJOYED COMPANION."

6. She is not an "AIRHEAD" - She is "REALITY
IMPAIRED."

7. She does not get "DRUNK" or "TIPSY" - She gets
"CHEMICALLY INCONVENIENCED."

8. She does not have "BREAST IMPLANTS" - She is
"MEDICALLY ENHANCED."

9. She does not "NAG" you - She becomes "VERBALLY REPETITIVE."

10. She is not a "TRAMP" - She is "SEXUALLY
EXTROVERTED."

11. She does not have "MAJOR LEAGUE HOOTERS" - She Is "PECTORALLY SUPERIOR."

12. She is not a "TWO-BIT HOOKER" - She is a "LOW COST PROVIDER."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:

1. He does not have a "BEER GUT" - He has developed a "LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY."

2. He is not a "BAD DANCER" - He is "OVERLY
CAUCASIAN."

3. He does not "GET LOST ALL THE TIME" - He
"INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS."

4. He is not "BALDING" - He is in "FOLLICLE
REGRESSION."

5. He is not a "CRADLE ROBBER" - He prefers
"GENERATIONAL DIFFERENTIAL RELATIONSHIPS."

6. He does not get "FALLING-DOWN DRUNK" - He
becomes "ACCIDENTALLY HORIZONTAL."

7. He does not act like a "TOTAL ***" - He develops a case of "RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION."

8. He is not a "MALE CHAUVINIST PIG" - He has "SWINE EMPATHY."

9. He is not afraid of "COMMITMENT" - He is
"RELATIONSHIP CHALLENGED."

10. He is not "HORNY" - He is "SEXUALLY FOCUSED."

11. It's not his "CRACK" you see hanging out of his
pants - It's "REAR CLEAVAGE."
 

sle

Joined
Nov 2, 2004
Messages
642
Was I ever offended! . . . Until I saw there was tit-for-tat for the guys. ;) At least it's balanced. :D
 

angelize56

Always remembered in our hearts
Joined
Apr 17, 2002
Messages
82,163
I need glasses...I thought it read euphenisms for the PG! ;) :D
 

Stoner

Banned
Joined
Oct 26, 2002
Messages
44,931
silly me :eek:
I thought it was "euphemisms" for the personal computer :confused:



Hi Sparky :D
 

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